DO I CELEBRATE WHAT I HAVE?
I am a great
believer in personal growth and development. It is healthy to assess your life
and relationships on a regular basis. However, there is a danger that we can
develop an attitude of continual
discontentment because we have never spent time celebrating what we have
achieved. I remember listening to a retired footballer. He had an exceptional
career but bemoaned the fact that when he achieved, he never truly celebrated
his success because he was always thinking about the next challenge. Your
relationships will be greatly enriched, if you learn to celebrate progress. The
following are some tips.
Create discussions not disciplinary
meetings
If you are
someone that summons your loved one to a meeting to talk about what you are
concerned about, it is unlikely that long-term, those in relationship with you
will gravitate towards such meetings. I
remember a husband saying to me, “When my wife says, she wants a meeting when I
come home, I know it is to complain about something!” Be careful not to create
a culture where others make an association between discussion and discipline.
Learn to create discussions where the epicentre is praise and gratitude.
This progress won't last
This is one of
the most destructive ‘scripts’ to hold in a relationship because
subconsciously, you are anticipating a counter-reality or demonstrating
mistrust in someone’s actions. There are times, due to previous relational
experiences, we mistrust genuine acts of kindness or attempts by someone to
change their behaviour. Being cynical, is the idea that the motivation behind a
person’s actions, are not genuine.